I 110% KNOW

Four days now, wow!  It doesn’t seem real at all.  Last year I was so concerned with minor details but calm all the way from rasing money to departure.  But this year….haha, this year has been nothing short of a race for finances, a sprint of fund-raisers and recently more geered toward work at least it seems more than last year.  Maybe my being a year older, very slightly more mature has made me look at the reality of the trip’s expenses more closely.  Regardless, with four days left now and feeling secure with what we’ve accomplished, I’m beginning to regain that sense of peace and confidence I had last year.  It’s overwhelming, the power of this peace is unlike any other it is truely being passed straight from God’s hand. 
 
Although my emotions are much the same now comparing to this time last year, my expectations of this trip me have changed conciderably.  I haven’t shared this clearly with anyone yet and this blog probably won’t get the point I’m trying to make either but I’m going to try and perhaps save some other first timer a little heartache ; ).  Let me explain.  Going last year I had never felt more in “God’s Will” (I use this term loosely because so many people take it so many ways, but this isn’t a blog on Biblical Theory so to be continued….)  but I had never felt more in God’s Will simply because I 110% KNOW that God wanted me to go last year.  I wish I had more of an explanation for this but I honestly don’t, I felt something that I had never felt before and for all I know may never feel again. It was far more than emotions or guilt but I’m way off my point so going back…….Last year was different, I went on the trip knowing I was suppose to be there but not sure what I was suppose to do, I mean I knew God didn’t want me just to go and see a third world country there was a reason for me to be there, understand? Looking back I feel that I went about it all wrong I went expecting to do whatever it was that the team and G.O. wanted me to do obviously but I went with an expectation for God. There are times tons of times when you can expect something from God, more specifically when He says He is going to do something; like how Noah expected protection form the storm, Moses expected God’s voice, but I was expecting God to speak to me just because I was doing what He wanted me to be doing for a week! I was sort of a bartering with the Almighty. I saw my listening to the Lord for a week as payment for Him unvieling my life plans or whatever other big thing I was expecting for God to give me.  Still following?  I’m not saying I didn’t hear from God last year in the D.R. that couldn’t be further from the truth He reveiled things to me that I so badly needed to see and things I will never forget.  In conclusion to this over-summarized Novel of a paragraph I see now that I can’t grow closer to God by doing works, no one can from works alone.  I can’t expect God to show up and work exactly the way I want Him to when I want Him to.  God isn’t a mall santa or a genie in a bottle…..bay-bae! LOL   But really He isn’t!    We should never think, “okay God talk to me,” (like I did) that may not make total sense at first but stay with me here…. When Paul says in 1 Thess. “Pray WITHOUT CEASING” He is serious about it  But think about it, praying WITHOUT CEASING?!?!?!  Only if you’re Harold McKee right? LOL  but really Paul means this literallyif we’re ever going to accomplish this task we can never be able to say…. “Okay God now talk…”  “Okay Santa I want…..” Is where you’re putting God when you say this! Prayer as I’m sure you know is not simply saying words in your head or muttering them outloud, it’s a conversation, you speak but you also….wait for it…… LISTEN so if we pray without ceasing or stopping we must always be listening never to have the moment of disconnect followed with, “Okay God now talk.”
 
 I’m so excited about this whole experience and this year I’m going back with one goal in mind  ” spread the kingdom ” <another story within itself but  I speak for the team when I say we plan on accomplishing this goal through service of any form. This is where ministry of any kind starts!
 
Last thing I’ve never been more excited for anything in my life I think I just said that o well….  This is such a great oppourtunity I’m so glad to be going. Very last, I am nothing short of honored to go again with such a great group of people I know this word iscalloused to say the least and worn out as my bandana but I mean it from the bottom of my heart!
 
 

a la paz,
 
TrrENTalina

~ by hmckee121 on July 10, 2008.

8 Responses to “I 110% KNOW”

  1. Well, you know you never cease to amaze me and you hate hearing this but at leat when I just comment your blogs I don’t get that look that says “shut up”! lol but seriously Trent, the illustration you used with Santa was EXACTLY on track and just how I am…I always speak and miss out on the listening part! That’s all I’m going to say because I know you are already mad 🙂

  2. Thanks Hootie, and thanks Harold for the title….. I love you all!!!

  3. ok quick quick question whats up with Hootie

  4. LOL How about we tell you on the trip? I don’t want the whole world seeing 🙂

  5. ok i guess that can wait

  6. hey, next time just call ur self Trent, (: miss yall hope your having fun tell everyone hey 4 me…im already board outa my mind but glad yall are getting such an oppertunity so I guess I can be patiant til you all get back…b safe c ya n about a week

  7. Hey Trent! Just wanted you guys (Beau, Paige and Kristen too) to know that you have been on my mind and my heart all week. You are very much in my prayers. I know God is blessing each and every one of you in ways we cannot imagine. I cannot begin to tell you how much I respect and admire what you guys for have chosen to do. How many young people your age would choose to do something like this on their summer vacation? You truly are a special group. I’m sure Dillon misses all you guys but you can tell him of all your adventures when you get home. Take care and be safe!

    (Isaiah 40:31) But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

  8. hey hope yall had a fun time, b carefull and have a safe trip home, cant wait to c yall, bout time yall come home..was gona come meet yall at the church Tues.. but think ill be at work sooo.. get rested on ur flight cuz i better get to c yall soon after, nun of that im to tired and worn out jazz either.. jk luv yall have a safe trip c ya

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